I don't really want to go into the specifics online, but suffice it to say that, for this week and the following two weeks, I am effectively being paid $44 an hour to sit on my ass.
It sounds like a good thing, really it does. Who wouldn't want to park themselves in front of a computer in a comfy chair and watch the dollars pile up? Making money for doing nothing: isn't that the ultimate dream?
You'd think so, but then you'd actually do it. You'd start off OK in hour one. By hour two, you'd be cross-eyed. By hour four, you'd be cross-eyed, hunchbacked, and raving. By hour seven, you'd be filling in small red dots every five minutes on the minute mark, just to feel as if you'd accomplished something.
It crosses my mind that work, though a lot of... work, is also somehow essential. Even once we've retired, we need to feel productive; we need to feel as if we're contributing something; we need to feel engaged. I've been going on and on about how Americans work too much, but there's such a thing, it turns out, as working too little.
I would sign off with "back to work," but it looks like I won't be getting there anytime soon.