After decades of glorious slumber,
I've developed insomnia. Grown-up, real-deal, hours-awake insomnia,
days on end and lasting for months. Needless to say, I am not a fan.
It's particularly galling in light of the fact that my baby is, and has
been for a while, an Olympic-caliber sleeper, conking out reliably at 7
PM and rising with startling and somewhat disgruntling cheerfulness
twelve hours later.
Not being able to settle to sleep
sucks, particularly when the change seems to be permanent, and
especially when sleep has been, in the past, a wellspring of joy. I
miss, acutely, the delight I used to take in going to bed- as if, every
night, I unwrapped the most perfect, most useful, and most personal of
gifts.
Now the bed is a bier. RIP sleep
And yet, life trundles on. It does
so in the face of wakefulness and loss, amidst cancer and paraplegia and
climate change and the million other miseries, gnat-sized to
elaphantine, comprising the human lot.
We're adaptable beasts. Even awake.
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